Five things I’m thankful for.
I’m thankful for the unchained Leader Program.
I’m thankful for
the men that I have connected to through that.
I’m thankful for my job.
I am thankful
that I’m at the job I’m at.
I’m thankful
for the encouragement I receive.
I’m thankful that
I can give encouragement.
one or two in a group experience pain-
but everyone all at once?
that screams enemy action.
especially against against kingdom work.
//
Circumstances change, life can be
chaotic,
disruptive, and distracting.
Life likes to scream. But
everyone, all at once,
things suddenly get more chaotic,
suddenly become more
distracting and demanding, especially
distracting away from Kingdom work?
That screams enemy action!
chaos and confusion-
The enemy’s domain.
disruption,
delay, distraction-
the tactics of the enemy-
degrade, destroy,
demean
If she isn’t convinced that
Christ is the only way and-
there is nothing I can do about that.
That is fully out of my control.
as much as I might like it to be
is out of my control and it is not my place
I visited Donny
during the Wake for his mother
and I tried to comfort and connect with him.
I fed our dog.
I went to the gym.
I did recovery work for my muscles.
Five things I’m
grateful for the leader unchained group.
I’m grateful for the men who
reached out to me
after it.
I am grateful for
Gilbert, Gill, who through God’s
grace alone reached out to me this morning. I’m grateful
for God’s work in my life. I am
grateful for God’s work in
his life.
I am grateful for the human connections and
growth that I feel God is doing in my life.
When I’m angry with God
when I’m angry, I’m bringing it to God.
When I am angry with other people,
with things
with situations,
I bring those things to God.
When I’m angry with God–
I know if I bring that to God,
He will allow me
to yell, and rant, and be incoherent, and in
pain, and just be angry,
even though it’s with Him.
Even if I say “God, I’m angry with You.”
And then He’d say, “Okay, tell Me how you feel, express it to Me.”
And I’d say “I’m angry with You.”
And then I would be angry, and tell him exactly how I feel, and why, or even just share the emotion with him.
And we would sit there.
Then He would ask, as He always does:
“Can I have My say?” or
“Do you want to know what I think about that?”
And then I am
scared, because sometimes when
I’m angry, I want to stay angry.
And sometimes my anger is
justified and sometimes it is not.
But sometimes I do not want to
hear what God has to say about my anger.
especially when the anger is
towards him, justified or not.
He is wise,
and patient as long as
I am seeking Him, seeking reconciliation.
There’s times, in my pettiness I don’t
want that. But I have to choose
to hear him out. And he’ll wait,
when I’m angry.
Love as Christ loved
the church
No small thing
Love as Christ loves
the church
No simple thing
publish broadcast, reaching out
to flow, read communicate-words are wind
wind that stays in place is writing.
don’t know where it comes from or where it goes,
but never still.
House breach the mass transition of stationary wind,
captured for millennia.
my words are my wind, air that moves.
writing captures my wind, cease the endless rustling,
transmit to others across space and time
(a day, a continent, a century, a galaxy)
the spread of captured wind, taken for the eyes and skin,
contained repeated, remembered.
Impacting and shaping the future and the new now.
to publish.
spinning around
the plates go seasons change
and seasons pound the ups and downs go
the winds blow here
the winds blow there
drag me in their changing repetition
to feel the pressure from a dying self
a mimicry, a mask that fades
the pressure builds,
something clings to the mask as it crumbles,
as something else wants to push it away.
the new self is born
the old mask dies
yet that which dies tries to cling to life.
//
I progress down my journey and take the steps-of-growth
the old self fades, but clings to life
fighting its’ own death
yet it must die.
I must take those steps.
Sinking into the flesh, I cling to the flesh
a dying thing.
it flickers and fades and it clings all the harder.
I must lean into the Spirit.
it is life,
true life leads to truer happiness, it feels
ephemeral, wispy, mist
yet it is more
enduring, more real, more true
than any flesh or bone.
Martin Write 